My husband and I recently made the decision that I should be a stay at home mom.
I dreaded the acronym SAHM, it makes me cringe a bit even now to type it. Ok, so that might be a little harsh, but it's true. It was never my heart's desire to stay at home. I should preface that by saying that I have nothing but undying admiration for the parents that I see doing the stay-at-home parenting (there are dads too!) thing so beautifully. I think that I never wanted to do it because I thought I wouldn't be good enough at it.
I'm not so disillusioned to believe that it's all picnics, parks, and play-do! I know that it's hard and takes incredible sacrifice. I know that there will probably be days when they make me cry before breakfast is even served, when they greet dad at the door with love and excitement after being rotten to me all day, and when I lock myself in the bathroom just to talk myself back to sanity. I didn't think I was up for that.
That's why I was so very suprised when both my head and heart started tugging me home. I knew that (once again!) God was calling me to a place I never wanted to go. Part of me still wants to make like Jonah... but most of me is so excited and anticipating how I can invest even more into my babies' lives.
I started this blog to document our journey and to give me an outlet. As difficult as the journey gets, I want to remind myself that we are called to love and serve.
It has been such a blessing to have had your children part-time while you worked. I look at the pics of you reading to your kids and read your post and tears come to my eyes. You are a great mom and I won't lie to you - it's hard, but so worth it. Praying for you and Jason and kids as you walk this road. You can be sure that I will show up once in a while to "rescue" you (or them) for a few hours or days!
ReplyDeleteLove you all, Jan